name: regret-minimizer
description: "Reframe a hard choice through the lens of future regret — which option will you regret less at 80? — to cut through short-term noise. Use when asked which will I regret less, help me decide with the long view, I don't want to look back and wish, or use the regret test on this. Produces each option projected forward to old age (the regret of doing it vs not), a distinction between action-regret and inaction-regret (people regret inactions more), the fear that's really driving the hesitation, and the choice that best minimizes lifelong regret — for the decisions that echo."
Regret Minimizer
For the choices that echo through a life — the leap, the risk, the road not taken — short-term pros-and-cons miss the point. This applies the regret test: project each option forward to age 80 and ask which you'll wish you'd chosen. It leans on a known truth — people regret the things they didn't do far more than the things they did — to cut through present fear and find the choice your older self will thank you for.
What This Skill Produces
- The forward projection — each option seen from age 80: the regret of having done it vs. having not
- Action vs. inaction regret — the reframe that inaction-regrets ("I never tried") tend to haunt more than action-regrets ("I tried and it didn't work")
- The fear underneath — what's actually driving the hesitation (usually fear of failure/judgment, which fades; regret doesn't)
- The regret-minimizing choice — which option your future self is least likely to lament
- A caveat — where this lens doesn't apply (reckless, irreversible-harm choices where fear is wisdom)
Required Inputs
Ask for these if not provided:
- The decision — the meaningful choice you're weighing
- The options — especially the bold one vs. the safe one
- What's holding you back — the fear or hesitation
- The reversibility — and whether a failure would be recoverable
Framework: Look Back From The End
- Project to old age. For each option, imagine looking back from 80 — which produces the wistful "I wish I had…"?
- Weight inaction-regret heavier. Research and experience agree: people more often regret the chances they didn't take. Factor that in.
- Name the driving fear. Surface what's really causing the hesitation — usually fear of failure or judgment, both of which fade far faster than regret.
- Test recoverability. A bold choice is more regret-minimizing when failure is survivable — check that the downside isn't catastrophic.
- Land the choice — with a caveat. Point to the option that minimizes lifelong regret, while noting this lens shouldn't justify reckless, irreversible-harm decisions where the fear is actually protecting you.
Output Format
Decision: [the meaningful choice]
At 80, looking back
- If you do it: [likely feeling — including if it fails].
- If you don't: [likely feeling — the road not taken].
Action vs inaction: [which regret tends to haunt more here].
The fear driving your hesitation: [what it is → does it fade or does the regret?].
Regret-minimizing choice: [the option] — because [reason].
Caveat: [where fear is wisdom, not to be overridden].
Quality Checks
Anti-Patterns
- Short-term pros/cons that miss the lifelong view.
- Always pushing the bold option even when the downside is catastrophic.
- Ignoring that some fear is protective wisdom.
- No actual choice at the end.
Example Trigger Phrases
- "Which will I regret less — taking the job abroad or staying?"
- "Help me decide with the long view. I don't want to look back and wish."
- "Should I finally start the thing I keep putting off? Regret test it."
- "Use the 'what would I regret at 80' lens on this."
- "I'm scared to do it but scared not to — which regret is worse?"